The boys in the dressing room say this about blogging: "It seems like a way to lose a lot of time", and "gain a lot of creepy friends."

On a whim I had listen to Alice, the CD I recorded last year. I was surprized at how much I like it. It really got me involved emotionally, that's something that I was trying to do with that recording but I'd thought I'd failed and nearly shelved the project. Truth is, I didn't fail at all.
So I've been putting it out there in the world again. I've given it to a couple of friends in the business who are are telling me it's great. It's very timely too becuas Sammy the sax player and I are talking about booking gigs for Cirkestra right now and I needed a boost of motivation. I think I just needed a reminder that I have something to sayy musically. Being in a job like mine one forgets that. It's because I don't write any music for this circus and really, it's hard for me to make a unique personal expression with the music I am playing.
A couple of my rich and famous friends came to see the circus and it has been very good to re-connect with them and...myself really.

I'm in Hollywood having a mental health afternoon. I've been rather moody lately and other people like the trombone player and bassist have noticed it. So I'm trying to fix the situation by spending time by myself doing things I want to do which mostly is reading books and working on this blog and working on my podcast which is coming along. I should be ready to go live soon. Today I did an episode about making pancakes.
I invited a few friends to the show. I sort-of got burned a little bit by people taking that as a chance to get all of their friends tickets. Some people I really did want to help out and I did. I think the rest of them I'm going to tell them I can't help them get their friends in. It's alesson in being clear about what you're giving away and why. Sometimes it's better not to give someone a gift. Or maybe another thing to say is that there is such a thing as too much. People get kind of greedy with free things.
I'm in the first coffee shop I discovered in Los Angeles a number of years ago. It's called Stir Crazy and it has a log cabin kind of decor. Across the street is Boo Radleys antique shop. Cool since I just read "To Kill a Mocking Bird". Now I'm reading "Running with Scissors". It's about a boy who gets adopted by his mom's shrink.

I want to say a few words here about music on the internet. A lot of people ask me how I feel about this. Usually because they've purchased or "shared" my music online.
I'm excited about the internet as a channel for my music to the world. I think the industry I work in is changing very quickly and probably for the better. The internet offers more music and better music than the older form of distrubution. The cost is very low for the listener and the emerging economic model channels more of that money to the artists rather than an oversized distribution "machine".
Companys like Napster and Rhapsody give access to their entire catalog for a low membership fee. You don't "own" it, you "have" it. You can listen online, offline, on your mp3 player, etc. so long as remain a member. It brings back to a time not so long ago when music was something you experienced rather than owned. It's not something to fight over, or sue each other over, or steal. It's something to listen to.
Sharing? I make a living making music for you. You probably would not ask me to work without pay. At the same time, people have always stolen things, and I'm not going to lose any sleep over that.
Ok that's it, does that cover it?

My people in L.A. Lawrence and Jenny took me out for lunch in the place they took me to for a send-off party a few years ago when I left L.A. It's the same place I'd go to for late night snacks after work or early morning breakfasts before work or just anything. Open 24/7. We saw the oompa-loompa midget there.
The next day we saw the red haired girl from E.R. at another place. It's fun being rich and famous in Los Angeles. I did find it slightly depressing after 48 hours though. Just so spread out so how do you not feel lonely in all that space?
I met my old friend Marijke who is dividing her time between writing content for hip-hop radio shows and interviewing such celebrities as Paris Hilton and Snoop Dog. She has even gotten new hair and a new car to match her rich and famous Los Angeles lifestyle.
Lawrence, meanwhile, was in the basement writing a song for a cool new movie which I probably am not allowed to say anything about. But it's set in Japan and the main character is American and you know how much I love movies about Americans in Japan. By the way I know the screenwriter from my days at the Zen Center of Santa Monica. mmm, Zen Centers of the rich and famous.
Speaking of filmmakers, I also met with Charity, the fifth of the "Five Sisters" production company. We took off our shoes and walked along the beach. She offered to put my shoes in her back pack but I told her I didn't want to stink up her bag. Not that my shoes really stink but it just seemed like it would be crossing a line.
I drove to Fresno yesterday morning to open the show. The drive is a good one with a balance of mountains and vineyards and orchards along the road. It's 200 miles. I stopped along the way and had the unfortunate, and depressing occasion to witness a family in the MacDonald parking lot getting their car towed away out there in the middle of nowhere.
The car was on a flatbed truck, clearly way past dead with not much of the front end, paint, or tires left. They were in the parking lot with everything they owned in garbage bags. It was a man, his wife, a daughter, a baby, two very nice little dogs, and a young boy who said, "Daddy what's happening to our car?"
"No more car."
That doesn't help me fight off the depression at all. But this morning while sitting in the Donniker I notice the posting on the wall which states that in case of emergency: "Do Not panic"

Things to do in Phoenix:

Go to a movie

Spend hours on the internet researching flights to Los Angeles

Check out rental cars too

Call the rental car co. to ask a question about insurance fees and find that they won't even discuss it with you unless you make a reservation (that you're allowed to cancel afterward)

Walk around backstage looking for the box that has your music in it

Play a show to a grateful audience

Barbecue out in the train yard, watch the jets take off at the airport, watch the fire works, notice smoke, observe a nearby building catching on fire

Play a morning show

Buy your plane ticket on the net

Contemplate where to stay Sunday night and how to get to the airport

Research hotels on the net

Walk around downtown and visit the hotels in person to get a feel for them

Decide not to decide about the hotel

Go to the post office, pay bills

Read your book at Starbucks

Clean your wardrobe box in the dressing room

Walk around downtown and listen to Alan Watts on the iPod saying that the zen teachings will turn your identity inside out.

In vegas I spent some time with Joel. Joel and I met in 1986 in Venice Florida when we arrived at the now defunct Clown College. I had a roommate that I didn't like and Joel had one he didn't like so we traded. We've been fast friends ever since. He lives in Vegas now with his wife and daughter.

Mostly we just marveled about the fact that 20 years has gone by. It seems like everything has changed and nothing has changed. That is an experience that one only gets from experiencing the passing of time. There is no short cut to that perspective.

A part of me still thinks I just met Joel in the recent past; that not much has happened since then. Maybe it hasn't. Maybe two decades is a short time. All I know is that it feels good to talk to an old friend

There is a store in Tucson called the Chicago Music Store which sells used instruments including accordions. I remember visiting the store in 1987 and I've been looking forward to visiting it again, perhaps I'd find my new accordion there.

I walked to the store on Wednesday and went in to ask about the accordions. The store has not been cleaned since 1987, there's a lot of dirt on the floor and dust on the instruments. Also, there are considerably fewer accordions. None, in fact that I fell in love with. This is not going to be easy.